The War Within

Romans 7:14-25  "So the trouble is not with the law, for it is spiritual and good. The trouble is with me, for I am all too human, a slave to sin.  I don't really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don't do it. Instead, I do what I hate.  But if I know that what I am doing is wrong, this shows that I agree that the law is good.  So I am not the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.  And I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. I want to do what is right, but I can't.  I want to do what is good, but I don't. I don't want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway.  But if I do what I don't want to do, I am not really the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.  I have discovered this principle of life--that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong.  I love God's law with all my heart.  But there is another power within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me.  Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death?  Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey God's law, but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin." NLT

Oh Lord,
How I wish this was no longer true of me...but alas, it is.  Although You have freed me from the penalty of sin, I am a new creation filled with the Holy Spirit,  old things are passed away and all things have become new; I must still die daily to myself and my own sinful nature to be a blessing to You and to others.  If Paul still struggled with this, I cannot expect that I can escape the war within.

There is a story about someone asking an old Indian about this.  He allegedly said, "I have two dogs, a white one and a black one, within me and they are fighting.  The one who wins is the one I feed the most." 

Lord, I have come to almost hate the month of October because of all the darkness that descends on us from all corners.  In the media " The Walking Dead", all manner of horror movies, even commercials with death and horror as their avenue to sell products.  Halloween decorations with witches, skulls, zombies etc. litter lawns and most retail stores.

This should be a month of celebration of Your bountiful harvests to provide for us in the winter.  Lord, I must feed the "good dog" daily and pray without ceasing to be able to get through.  Evil temptations are on every side to do the wrong thing, to think the wrong thing so I might act, think, or speak the wrong things!

 Lord, what is in my heart?  Is it love, mercy and grace?  Is it Your light, peace that passes all understanding, compassion for others, and a real love for Your people, Your Word, and a love for the lost?
I must confess that  at any given time if I am not watchful, the temptation for self-pity, self-righteousness, annoyance with another's behavior, fear, discouragement, and a judgmental attitude can sneak in and take over.  I like Paul say, "Oh, what a miserable person I am!"  

But then have to agree with him when he says, "Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord."  Lord, please control my every thought, word, and deed!